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After Eights


hawkati

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Well, this is the eighth time dammit...after that I'm done.

Got to get this one done first. Offski

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A well trodden path - A361 via devises,  frome,  Glastonbury etc - that's already a hive of industry preparing for glastopolis. A swift howdy to silbury hill & the tor

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I think there's a theme developing 

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All the way to Taunton, which is a steaming bag of poo. On fire. I can only guess the motorway is closed - total gridlock in town. I fight my way through and overtake Everything to make up lost time - hoping to get to campsite at tintagel by 7pm.

Gotta stop for these though. This is only missing an H

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...in the hand...

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I arrive! 

Ah...

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That'll explain why they didn't answer the phone. Completely shut.

Plan B

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But first, walkies

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More lens flare than ever necessary 

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Previously ventured spookycave

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Where was I? Oh yes, discovering god. Strangely I didn't ignite as i crossed the threshold 

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I can imagine getting exorcised for pitching a tent in the graveyard but just nearby ought to be dead peaceful 

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You picked a nice day for a long trip!

Lovely pics. Hope you slept well.

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2 hours ago, lexiden said:

You picked a nice day for a long trip!

Lovely pics. Hope you slept well.

My tent became possessed by spirits, or the wind as they call it outside Cornwallland. Deployed earplugs but still woke several times. No worries,  onwards, etc...

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1 hour ago, hawkati said:

My tent became possessed by spirits, or the wind as they call it outside Cornwallland. Deployed earplugs but still woke several times. No worries,  onwards, etc...

Nothing worse.

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1 hour ago, Johnno said:

Nothing worse.

Fkkn spirits. Bastards one & all. Talisker excepted.

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2 hours ago, Toneale said:

@hawkati you sir, are a funkin' leg end.

That is all. Carry on. :thumbsup:

what he said!

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19 hours ago, hawkati said:

Well, this is the eighth time dammit...after that I'm done.

 

You might have said that out loud but no one believes you!

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There's about 36 leg ends taking part this year. One is outside trying to sort a fuelling issue right now with 6 hours till kick off.

Thankfully I just had to sort aux lights after a dodgy connection killed them but apparently all good to go - the bike more than the rider. 😂

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11 minutes ago, hawkati said:

There's about 36 leg ends taking part this year. One is outside trying to sort a fuelling issue right now with 6 hours till kick off.

Thankfully I just had to sort aux lights after a dodgy connection killed them but apparently all good to go - the bike more than the rider. 😂

Tis the ldc way. 

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On 6/18/2024 at 9:11 PM, hawkati said:

Well, this is the eighth time dammit...after that I'm done.

 

Yeah, no.

Lexie and I looking at your post at P1, knowing that you'll ride this every year until doomsday

:D

@lexiden

Edited by blow_away
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On 6/18/2024 at 10:13 PM, hawkati said:

Where was I? Oh yes, discovering god. Strangely I didn't ignite as i crossed the threshold 

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I can imagine getting exorcised for pitching a tent in the graveyard but just nearby ought to be dead peaceful 

What was she like then, that there god ? Fake beard? 

Nice pic, the cover for the next Saxon re-re-re union?

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Posted (edited)

\ah. where was i? yesh - some woeful graveyard where the wind picked up and shook the tent sideways all night. Cunty spirits. No sleep worth mentioning so thoroughly bedraggled in the morning. 

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nevertheless, dry day, bit cloudy, almost ideal. Nice. A brief 80 mile zoop to land's end - good for scrubbing in tyres a little more and caught up with a couple of other contenders whilst having a roadside bite. Good old chat then we set off together. lost em in seconds after a couple of cheeky overtakes - i really have no patience for hanging around. Got to LE and caught up with several others , some fettling running repairs, others slinging on manylots of stickers. I get given a bunch of CR dots of assorted colours and sizes - quite a few riders have written names on them of doners which is a nice touch. Karl arrives with his old blade - it was a choice of that or his zxr400, which would have broken him. I'd implored him to use the blade which like my r1 looked good but was rotten underneath. He had filled his tank with white vinegar/salt countless times and shaken his arms off trying to get rid of the acres of rust. It worked, but he had 11 (eleven!) fuel filters stashed under the seat! 

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There's too many dullsvilles whcih many considered the tortoise of the event - nice & steady but really long tank range so they'll pass a few hares

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Phantom of the opera - jamie(?) - first time back since doing it on a 125 in 2014. 

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Offski for the prologue - 18 miles to hayle & travelodge. Farcical moment when one rider takes the wrong exit from roundabout and several ( myself included,ffs) blindly follow. back on track, brim tanks at station opposite motel and then food frenzy, awards and general piss taking. One ward goes to Harry Tait, a cancer survivor who's still riding long after i hope to be dead. Massive respect. 

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There's quite the frenzy of last minute preparation & repairs including one dullsville that is simply fukkered - it can only manage 35mph. The rider bites the bullet, gets the bike home and returns with an Apirilia 660 - he cannot have possibly had any sleep at all that night. The rest of us retire early ready to launch at 4am. I'd say fack but i'm too knacked. 

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Edited by hawkati
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Posted (edited)

it's still a minor miracle that trafpol haven't just built a wall of cop cars across the A30 two miles down the road to nick one & all, but maybe they're aware but also note the reasons why we do this. tired but wired i cannot sleep properly regardless of trying - naomi is telling me to get some sleep at 1am which is like the pot calling the kettle a gent - she's full nocturnal and finds sleep impossible. Up at 3.20 - it takes a while to shift my stuff - tent bag to go in van, tankbag with about 10 kgs of tools etc dammit. out, ready, whispered chats & laughter - everyone is gunning for it with an element of concern, not the least about speed cameras. There's a right old mix of new blood and old stagers but we're all feeling it. Dry as a bone thankfully, because when the flag drops it's 50 yards to the roundabout,  throw it in on stone cold tyres with a prayer to the grippy tarmac gods of pure mischief and then pin it. I feel and hear the michelin road 5 shimmy and chirp and then i just fuck off....for 4 miles. downhill slope, slope sign, parking sign, then hit the brakes hard, crawl past the speed camera and fang it again...For just a few miles - A30 roadworks. This sets the precedent for the entire journey - i've never known it so bad for roadworks, diversions and endless red lights. This particular detour takes about 20 minutes of minor roads in a far too polite chain gang of bikes, held up by vans & lorries who have no right to be delivering vital stuff at such an hour. Bastards. I get past a bunch of bikes all queuing behind a van, am lucky not to take a wrong turn, and somehow end up back on the A30 ( mainly dull bypass these days) and settle to a comfort zone of 87mph. The bike can do this all year, myself less so these days but getting the road miles in earlier this year has made me more bike fit than i've been for years. 

Did i mention the dull A30 bypass? It's too tempting to go faster, but i'll rinse fuel too much if i do  - i'm allowing 140 desperate miles between fill ups, but i know that gets reduced a hell of a lot at ton + speeds. Enforced slow at one point, mercifully brief - a bank of fog, dense but only for a mile or three, then offski again asap. Into Exeter with a dullsville or two for company and i have to fuel whilst they don't. Bastard tortoises. Thankfully yellow visor with drop down shade means no wasted time changing visors and i crack on. i know the route through exeter but again i channel captain gormless and follow a couple of riders - we exit at a junction of the M5 and have to double back to the correct roundabout - straight on up the A30 and on very familiar territory towards Yeovil, wincanton etc. 

I ought to mention that i've hooked up with the notorious @vfiend and Nige, riding a naked blade and knacked srad respectively. Nige's bike is fluffing and he's wary of it. Everyone else is wary of his brakes since the lever comes back to the bars, but more of that later. We're all settled in to an 87mph is comfort zone, sometimes a little less, sometimes a lot more - this coincides with seeing a spec of a bike in the distance and winding it on. The roadworks have delayed us enough for there to be a fair number of civvy bikes commuting, but occasionally there's a dullsville, teapot, gpx600 etc to reel in and leave for dead. 

On the non bypass sections i make more progress - i've ridden these roads for decades and i'm so aware of blind crests, sharp bends and hidden junctions that i can just crack on and mercilessly overtake everything in front of me, with the other two right behind, no quarter given - there's no way i'm shaking them off and i'm gently gobsmacked nige hasn't boosted himself over the horizon already - maybe we're both a little more relaxed about this even these days? 

Quality moment is the turnoff for the A350  - it's a t junction and knowing exactly where it is i've cheekily overtaken a car just before - vfiend follows suit but i think he took my indicating left as saying i'm pulling back in, which i never do. A moment of lack of thought on my part leaves him piling into the junction on a full blown stoppie - i confess i laughed, cos i was bloody well impressed! 

Onwards and indeed upwards, northbound for Cirencester and pitstop 1. This route is high maintenance with a little too much built up areas, roundabouts and too much traffic - it all gets carved relentlessly - i'm working the three second rule like a bastard and getting further away from the others...this won't last and i happily squander time at pitstop 1 with good pb evo mates - @Thunderbolt, @blow_away, @lexiden and @Versatile. Their company and help is genuinely appreciated to the point that it's on my mind and twenty miles later i ping Al and ask him to get a photo of the muttley crew...

 

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more laterer!

Edited by hawkati
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21 minutes ago, hawkati said:

trafpol

Seriously? That's the best they could come up with?

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31 minutes ago, Johnno said:

Seriously? That's the best they could come up with?

they're too fast to use whole words...

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9 hours ago, hawkati said:

...

Quality moment is the turnoff for the A350  - it's a t junction and knowing exactly where it is i've cheekily overtaken a car just before - vfiend follows suit but i think he took my indicating left as saying i'm pulling back in, which i never do. A moment of lack of thought on my part leaves him piling into the junction on a full blown stoppie - i confess i laughed, cos i was bloody well impressed! 

...

From where I was sat, it looked like you had completely forgotten the junction...

Though I admit, my entirely unintentional 20m stoppie was cool.

The driver I'd just overtaken and then pulled left of probably thought significantly less of it, though 😅

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2 minutes ago, vfiend said:

From where I was sat, it looked like you had completely forgotten the junction...

Though I admit, my entirely unintentional 20m stoppie was cool.

The driver I'd just overtaken and then pulled left of probably thought significantly less of it, though 😅

Yeah, nah...I'd completely forgotten I wasn't alone, sorry! In my head it was " I'm turning left, but I can overtake just one more car then throw it left" because I can be a gent like that. Sorry! 

Cool stoppie though🤘

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Just now, hawkati said:

Yeah, nah...I'd completely forgotten I wasn't alone, sorry! In my head it was " I'm turning left, but I can overtake just one more car then throw it left" because I can be a gent like that. Sorry! 

Cool stoppie though🤘

It's all good, no one died :thumbsup:

It was funny seeing other riders appear in the distance, you got a sniff of blood one were on a mission.

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Just now, vfiend said:

It's all good, no one died :thumbsup:

It was funny seeing other riders appear in the distance, you got a sniff of blood one were on a mission.

In the context of what we've just discussed...

This one time, in 2014, my first ldc. I spy a speck in the distance and thinking it's another contender I wind it on to try catch him. He's going for it so it takes 30 bloody miles to get on his back wheel. I finally overtake him, in his words "crossed up, airborne and flicking the horns" 

Naturally about half a mile later we're at elishaw on the A68 and I've piled straight on instead of turning right. It takes another hour to catch him again. Fack!

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Posted (edited)

Out of pitstop one and it’s time to crack on – there’s a handful of riders well out in front of me, no one behind and this is the solo grim bit – if only because the A429 is the old Fosse way – roman road and we all know how straight those bloody things are don’t we? I settle into a merciless hack, just over taking absolutely everything in front of me with zero hesitation and little margin for error. It’s the one occasion where politeness and decent riding back a back seatand the gloves are off. It gets wearing but a pattern emerges – just observation, interpretation, action, over and again. Pass and pass and pass again. There’s a brief interest at Fossebridge – suddenly the road curves and dips sharply tehn up again in a glorious S bend. 40mph? yeah, nah, twice that, getting a proper lean on and revelling in the delight of the road 5 tyres – they really are very very good. For once I’ve got that equation right – I bought a set of scarcely worn tyres for £79 a few months ago and set them aside for this event when I knew I really needed to trust the rubber.

Still very much in my neighbourhood I fang it past Bourton on the water and on to Stow – pausing at the lights and the gentlest of really low but long wheelies away up the hill. I get all twee and civilised for a few seconds, gracefully letting granny wobble across the road then hack past everything else showing my true colours. Past Morton in Marsh and thankfully there’s a few more bends to alleviate the squared off thinking and that distracts from the beginnings of aches and twinges – that’s 250 miles or a quarter of the journey done and if the roads are too dull then the mind focusses on the bad stuff. Get some challenges in and the pain disappears – brains are weird like that.

Couple of roundabouts and for the first time there’s just a hint of toesliders on the deck – surprising because I always ride with the ball of feet on the pegs, all tucked in. But it’s no ducati and the pegs are lower. Meh.

Warwick and bypass. Damn. That’s not engaging the brain at all so I just go faster. I’ll be gobsmacked if I don’t collect points today. Into Coventry and round the inner ring road – I’m glad I remember this, choose the correct exit and pile out of town on the A444 to Nuneaton, a town name that’s made me & naomi snigger…

Out the other side, still on the A444 to Burton on Trent – this is very familiar territory from countless excursions to visit friends & family in the peak district, and has a fine selection of great sweeping bends that are entertaining at legal speeds and demanding beyond that. Love it.

Into burton and somehow I’ve caught Nige and @vfiend – buggered if I know how because they’re not hanging around at all. But one thing I’ve got going for me is relentless traffic carvery – nige gets quite verbal about this on film at pitstop 2! It’s the A38 bypass to Derby & Ripley which is heavy with traffic and a pain but we claw our way through by fair means & foul, determined to hit the pitstop hard & early. A61 to Clay Cross but I absolutely have to fuel up a few miles first and the others crack on. Five miles later I’m in and immediately get interviewed by @wavey – the air turns indigo as I attempt to describe the journey so far.

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Gobsmacked I see Nige & vfiend arrive after me – I can only guess they’ve just fuelled up elsewhere. On a good note there’s a handful of other bikes that have got there before us, possibly with greater tank range, but they’re not rushing to leave whereas we’re not falling into the rest trap.

Onwards.

Edited by hawkati
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  • 2 weeks later...
On 6/30/2024 at 9:08 AM, hawkati said:

\ah. where was i? yesh - some woeful graveyard where the wind picked up and shook the tent sideways all night. Cunty spirits. No sleep worth mentioning so thoroughly bedraggled in the morning. 

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nevertheless, dry day, bit cloudy, almost ideal. Nice. A brief 80 mile zoop to land's end - good for scrubbing in tyres a little more and caught up with a couple of other contenders whilst having a roadside bite. Good old chat then we set off together. lost em in seconds after a couple of cheeky overtakes - i really have no patience for hanging around. Got to LE and caught up with several others , some fettling running repairs, others slinging on manylots of stickers. I get given a bunch of CR dots of assorted colours and sizes - quite a few riders have written names on them of doners which is a nice touch. Karl arrives with his old blade - it was a choice of that or his zxr400, which would have broken him. I'd implored him to use the blade which like my r1 looked good but was rotten underneath. He had filled his tank with white vinegar/salt countless times and shaken his arms off trying to get rid of the acres of rust. It worked, but he had 11 (eleven!) fuel filters stashed under the seat! 

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There's too many dullsvilles whcih many considered the tortoise of the event - nice & steady but really long tank range so they'll pass a few hares

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Phantom of the opera - jamie(?) - first time back since doing it on a 125 in 2014. 

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Offski for the prologue - 18 miles to hayle & travelodge. Farcical moment when one rider takes the wrong exit from roundabout and several ( myself included,ffs) blindly follow. back on track, brim tanks at station opposite motel and then food frenzy, awards and general piss taking. One ward goes to Harry Tait, a cancer survivor who's still riding long after i hope to be dead. Massive respect. 

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There's quite the frenzy of last minute preparation & repairs including one dullsville that is simply fukkered - it can only manage 35mph. The rider bites the bullet, gets the bike home and returns with an Apirilia 660 - he cannot have possibly had any sleep at all that night. The rest of us retire early ready to launch at 4am. I'd say fack but i'm too knacked. 

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Lovely stuff!! Cracking write up, I spotted me and you there too 🤣 also went blindly the rong way at the roundabout when my brain knew it was rong 🤣 dickhead

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I must crack on and write the rest - just been doing too much of everything while being a zombie since ldc. Nightshifts this week so if I get some peace I'll get writing...

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I’ve got the video to edit yet but new job on nights and no spare time.. I’m off for 2 weeks after this week… editing, biking, sleeping can’t wait

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1 hour ago, Northernmotovlog said:

I’ve got the video to edit yet but new job on nights and no spare time.. I’m off for 2 weeks after this week… editing, biking, sleeping can’t wait

I'd mentioned elsewhere that I'd thought of learning how to video edit and throw something together for you tube to raise money for CR.

No chance- I'd just be handing so much evidence over to ban me for a long time...

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Posted (edited)

Ah -the difficult third stage. Exiting Clay Cross it’s a straight zoop up to Sheefield via the A61, and it’s a bit of a pain in the arse. I praise any number of known deities thaty I had the wisdom to fit raised bars – there’s a fair old amount of city shuffling to get through this sprawling mess. Low point? Possibly – it’s high maintenance gnashing through the traffic and clawing for position lane splitting as much as possible knowing all the time your average speed is now painfully slow. Out the other side and up the Penistone road, snigger!

Left onto the A629 and I’m in more familiar territory gunning for Huddersfield which I know well enough – I’ve mates living there. Hooked up with nige and @vfiend  again – we keep doing this, and into the city centre we go. We hit the centre ring road and just as we arrive at lights Nige says “stick with me, I know this area!” – they go right of a car, I tuck in the inside and go left – I know exactly where I’m going. To my surprise they’ve gone the other way and I don’t see them again for a while. Out on the Halifax road I wave at mates house and carry on, again just overtaking everything in my path – it pays to be merciless – every overtake saves preciousssss seconds and they add up to hours at the end. Up & over and down into west Halifax and at an awkward junction I turn proper left rather than oblique left, realise after a hundred yards and it takes a minute to turn round….just as Nige & Vfiend pass in front taking the correct road. I say Fack! I must have got a minute ahead, now squandered.

We carry on – hacking through traffic when we can through Burnley and beyond, then at Whalley we strangely turn left at the lights and right into some yard….which turns out to be Nige’s bike workshop. Met by his wife, son Ben and rest of family it’s good to stop for a while – that urban stint was a bit of a bastard.

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We’re there for about ten whole minutes having a chat and a laugh then on we go – into the countryside at last and some seriously swift sweeping bends and fine views. I stop at a river bridge because there’s an awesome old arched bridge downstream. Cromwell’s bridge it’s called.

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Picture taken I crack on though no chance of catching the others now, but it’s not too far to the next pitstop. Over the M6, turn right at the roundabout (first proper knee down of the day) and straight up the A6 for just a few miles  to Guy’s thatched hamlet. Time for another quick break.  My chain get lubed, visor cleaned, had a swift food frenzy – bananas, redbull, choccy browne – all good stuff, then after ten minutes I get a wiggle on and blast off again.

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Edited by hawkati
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2 hours ago, blow_away said:

This is excellent.

You should write a book about your rides.

"It was a dark & stormy night 🦇"

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4 hours ago, hawkati said:

"It was a dark & stormy night 🦇"

Makes me think of this..... 

Screen_Shot_2017-03-03_at_2.37.36_PM.jpg

 

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